Crystal Ballroom
The Crystal Ballroom is, as the name suggests, elegant. Massive chandeliers adorn the ceiling and intricate moulding frames enormous paintings around the cavernous space. With so much room, you’d think there’d be a sense of freedom at the Crystal. You’d be right, until you attended a sold-out show.
It’s hard to pay attention to the beauty of the ballroom whilst being elbowed in the ribs and yelled at for spilling someone’s drink. The sheer number of bodies corporate owners McMenamins pack into the space would be impressive if it wasn’t insultingly uncomfortable and seemingly unsafe. The first concert I ever attended in Portland was here, and over the past 3 years I’ve experienced the same factory-farm conditions any time the box office sells out.
Now that’s out of the way, this venue does have a lot to offer when not packed to the gills. A beautiful and bouncy hardwood floor adds elasticity to dancing and 3 bars ensure you won’t have to wait too long for a beverage no matter where you choose to stand. Access to further bars on the lower levels allows for a bit of space and quiet if things get to be too much, and there are benches along the walls for those who burn out but also can’t bear to leave.
I would recommend grabbing some food on SW 12th ave, perhaps at Lardo, Bamboo Sushi or Grassa before the show. Peruse Everyday Music for some vinyl if the mood tickles you. If you know your show is sold out, ARRIVE EARLY AS FUCK. It will be crazy, and not in a fun way.
Sound: Depends on artist. Ballroom, good acoustics. Lack of speaker coverage.
Food: Downstairs. $$.
Drinks: Lola’s room, main bar and balcony bar. $$.
Seating: Mostly standing with a balcony.
Shows: Music.
Music Genres: All.
Security: Pat down, metal detectors, bag check.
Location: 1332 W Burnside St
Phone: (503) 225-0047
Camera policy: No detachable lenses.
